Total Failure - Dead End

Total Failure – Burn Out


Sometimes there are moments in life when it just goes down and it does not look like it would ever get better.

Is it just a moment?

In my case it wasn’t just a moment. I should have listened to the signs long ago but I just had no chance to escape until my body did not resist the pressure anymore. Locked in a relationship, based on love, misunderstandings, different characters and constant arguments, there was a moment when I was just sitting on the couch and time passed by until the nightmare was finally over. I was trying to get my life together but what was the purpose. I could not define myself as a happy husband and my health went down the road over the final 2 years, ending with a divorce.

I was 40 when she left and my entire life broke down over my head. Projects we had built together became worthless. I had no power to stand up. Due to my health issues I had stopped working, and what was left, was an empty apartment and depth.

Would I have the power to get up again?

Would it be worth it to fight for life in a world filled with problems and drastic changes of values?

I live in an apartment on the seventh floor and I stood on the balcony many times, asking myself these questions, while facing the moment when my head would punch to the ground after a jump.

During the final time of my relationship, my heart got cold. When it finally was over, I could at least cry again to let go the long lasting blockages.

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